Monday, September 14, 2009

Why is my cat sniffing the electrical outlet?

This morning, I get up and Bat-Bat is sniffing my electrical outlet. Bat is a cat. With a stubby tail. It looks like a rabbit. We call him "bunny cat". He's not the sharpest tool in the shed. In fact, Bat-Bat is well, a dullard. He's the cutest thing in the world, but he's also fat. Last time we weighed him, he was 10 pounds, 3 pounds heavier than his brother! 3 pounds is a big difference on a cat! His actual name is Batali and his brother is Bourdain. Yeah, I know, we watch way too much Food Network. So this morning Bat is sniffing the electrical outlet. And I'm thinking, "If he licks it, will he be electrocuted?".
Why would he be sniffing the electrical outlet? Is his nose wet enough to shock him? And if so, is he dumb enough to put his face there again?

He finally got bored and waddled off to go lay in the middle of the hall, where he can block the most traffic, causing us to trip over him and spend lots of our day pushing him out of the way.

Note: This is an old post, Bat is now pushing 13 pounds. I got these out of order, I'm trying to rescue my ebay blogs for posterity's sake before they shut them down. The photos are of Bat front and Bat back. He's nubber-ific!

Saturday, September 12, 2009

So we weighed Bat-Bat today

12 pounds. My not even 8 month old cat weighs 12 pounds. The tiny, tiny kitten I got for Christmas is so big that if I put him on my his head is in the crook of my arm and his feet hang off my lap. He's the size of a 2 month old baby! I really don't know what happened. He's working hard every day to earn the name "Fat Bat". As you can see, Bat-Bat has nearly no tail. He really is "The Grande Orange"!

He weighs 3 pounds more than his brother, Bourdain.

He eats a freakish amount of Meow Mix every day! That's what we get for naming him Batali, I guess. As you can tell, I love him best. We adopted them from the animal shelter, and this was the best present I ever got. My husband is a truly wonderful man, buying me Bat-Bat and his brother for Christmas.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Ferret love

As you know, I have a ferret. I have 2 ferrets actually. Antti & Zascha. Antti is my dumb ferret. Zascha a a nuclear physicist compared to Antti. As weasels go, she's a genius. She never does weird things, except steal stuff, but that's normal for a ferret.

No, it's always Antti, getting into my dryer vent hose, hiding under the water heater, knocking over all the shampoo bottles and biting the cats, then horking down his food to the point he chokes and you think you're going to do weasel CPR, and he makes you want to scream.

And you pick him up to make him stop, and he yawns and looks at you with those beady blank eyes, and yawns and snuggles into you and falls asleep. That's when you realize you love the little guy, even though you had been considering making a scarf out of him not 10 minutes earlier. He'd make a lousy scarf anyhow. Too skinny.

Antti helping me pack a shipment. Well, mostly he just dumps the peanuts out and frolics in them.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

My goal for today-Go to the bathroom without the ferrets

Sure that sounds simple, but since the ferret figured out how to pop the door open, I can't go to the bathroom my self. Taking a bath, forget it! he wants to be in there, pushing the shampoo bottles over and stealing the soap. And I won't get into how disconcerting it is to feel furry bodies on my feet when I'm trying to brush my teeth. Jumping up & down screaming because something furry slithered across your feet first thing in the am is no way to start you day.

And not having toothpaste run down your chin as you shriek at a furry fiend makes you look pretty cool too!

Photo of Zascha having a bath with her tub toy. Zascha enjoys her tub time.

Friday, September 4, 2009


I'm cleaning up after the weasels. Weasel vs. bathroom trashcan, weasel 1 , trashcan zero! Trying to sweep and the crazy little bugger keeps hopping on the broom. Stop it already, so I can clean up! No telling what he's destroying while I write.

Antti loves to dump over the trashcan, pull out the paper and then he stands there so proud, looking at me, like "See mom, look what I did"? Just beaming. Stupid weasel.

And then when he's done, he likes to push over the shampoo bottles and soap, pleased as punch. H works so hard pushing them onto the floor, as if he can't believe I've cluttered up his shelf yet again.

I do love him. I do. Just keep saying that until you believe it.

Ferret slip n slide

Just in case you ever wondered what the wonder weasel looked like. Yesterday he was chasing Zascha and as he run through the house into the kitchen, his back feel slid out from under him and he went sliding through the kitchen, front paws out and the most confused look in his beady little eyes. He slid past the sink, the pantry & made it all the way into the laundry room, flat on his tummy like an unintentional slip n slide. He looked to surprised. He finally lost momentum in the laundry room, and then he got up on his feet, shook himself off, sort of checking his feet like "What happened?" and took off again. I don't think I have ever laughed so hard.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Ferret oh ferret, stealer of stuff!

Ferret oh ferret, when will you get enough?

Ah, my little furry bandits, did you think I didn't see you grab the eraser out of the kids back pack and run down the hall with it? I did. That's why I'm chasing you, screaming "Drop it, Drop it"!

Erasers, pencils, socks. We even made a video of Zascha dragging a baby doll from my living room to her secret stash under my dresser. I didn't have the heart to take the doll away from her,so it's living under my dresser. Silly ferret. When will you get enough?

Things I found under my dresser this week

2 pink socks
1 baby doll
1 koozie
1 plastic key chain
1 keychain bottle opener
2 pens
4 erasers
1 half eaten piece of soap -root beer scent
1 half eaten peanut butter cracker

This is the secret ferret stash. And this is one day's worth. I love them, but seriously...

Friday, April 17, 2009

Capri Sun is the object of (my ferrets) affection!

Capri Sun apparently inspires spasms of joy in ferrets. More precisely, knocking over the box, and stealing pouches of Capri Sun.

Dragging them under the couch, back to his den, and accidentally punching the pouch, gushing puddles of liquid everywhere! The juice pouch theft just blows my mind, because they are half the size of the ferret, and yet the little thief can drag it from one end of the house to the other! That goes with his fetish for my snacks from my storage bin.

He loves to steal everything from ramen to packets of pretzels and fruit rolls. He doesn't care if the pouch is empty, he just wants the Capri Sun!! Just try and take it away from him!! He'll fight you for it, and run across the living room, trying to hide the object of his affection, before that human takes it away! Capri Sun the object of my ferrets affection.

My children, however, would like him to be just a little less attached to the Capri Sun. They're thirsty!

Friday, April 10, 2009

Klepto ferret attacks

So they ferret has developed a new skill. He steals things. It started out small, fruit roll ups and the occasional bag of chips, but new he's graduated to the jumbo sized Lay's and ramen noodle packages. I'm chasing the wonder weasel around the house, trying to retrieve my lunch.

"Not for ferrets, hey, that's the last spicy chicken, bring that back RIGHT NOW!" Not very dignified, I admit, but we found his secret stash in the back room, and this is after wrestling several snack packs of chips and the aforementioned ramen from him, in a bizarre human/weasel tug of war. Which made me reason, I'm out of shape, (in my defense, he's waaay stronger than he looks) and he's sneaky.
He got back into the cart where I keep the kids snacks several times after we fought over the ramen! And putting him in his cage to keep him away from the snackies doesn't work.

He thrashes around, shaking the bars and throwing himself against the cage in righteous ferret indignation. I always relent and take Antti out. He's just sooo mesmerizingly cute. So back we go, me trying to pet the ferret and hold him (ha, he will not be contained, he is a wild, independent, klepto ferret!) and he breaking free and plotting the next attack of the snacks. Ah, I hear the crinkle of the 100 calorie pack now!

About me: When not wrangling ferret, I sell things on Bonanzle. Lots of books, great prices~

I also have 9 cats, 3 mice, a rat and hamster. And some kids.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Still life with...ferret?

My son got a ferret for his birthday, because he needed something else to feed and take care of. Or rather, I did, apparently, because even though he is 19 and in college, I still seem to be the one changing the cage.
Ferrets are extremely intelligent, enjoy playing with the kittens and stealing bags of potato chips out of the pantry.
Most of my day consists of removing the ferret from places he's decided to explore, like my sock drawer, the pantry, the bathroom trash can and the leg of my pants. His new trick is "knock all the soap and shampoo off the edge of the bathtub", which he follows up with a rousing game of dump over the trash can and spread the contents throughout the house!
The spawn named him "Antii" which in Norse or Danish or some other unpronounceable language apparently means "white furry rodent that sheds a half a pound of fur on your black t-shirt every time you pick him up". This leads to us keeping lint rollers all over the house, so that we can roll the fur off each other before we leave the house, so the neighbors don't think we are some sort of weirdos cultists who roll in animal fur.

But they view us with some suspicion anyhow, as we walk to ferret on a leash outside, and have 9 cats. So my day now consists of:

"feed ferret, and take out of the cage when he begins banging on it. Watch him drink out of the cat bowl and wonder what is wrong with his water bottle? Remove ferret from pantry. Remove ferret from under recliner. Remove ferret from under stove while maniacally yelling "Not for ferrets!". Put ferret in cage. Listen as he shakes the bars like some pathetic prisoner. Relent and let ferret out. Hunt for missing ferret. Find ferret asleep behind dresser. Pry ferret off of kitten. Take fruit roll up away from ferret. Wonder, briefly, where the fruit roll up came from.
Put ferret back in cage for the night."

I'm pretty fond of the little weasel though. Such a cute face. Such a cute, mischievous face...
Antii, where are you? Gotta go..